A Guide to Compassionate Support: How to Respond After a Sexual Assault Disclosure

 

Believe and Validate:

Start by expressing belief and validation. Affirm that you believe the survivor and acknowledge the courage it took to share their experience. Avoid questioning or doubting their account.

Listen Empathetically:

Create a safe space for the survivor to share their feelings and thoughts. Practice active listening, allowing them to speak at their own pace. Avoid interrupting or making judgments.

Respect Their Choices:

Respect the survivor's choices in how they want to proceed. Understand that every survivor's journey is unique, and they may have different needs and preferences regarding reporting, seeking medical attention, or counseling.

Avoid Blaming Language:

Be mindful of language that may inadvertently place blame on the survivor. Phrases like "Why were you there?" or "What were you wearing?" can contribute to feelings of shame and self-blame.

Express Empathy, Not Pity:

Offer empathy rather than pity. Let the survivor know that you are there to support them and that their experience does not define their worth or identity.

Ask Before Taking Action:

Before taking any action, such as contacting authorities or sharing the information with others, ask the survivor for their consent. Respect their autonomy and agency throughout the process.

Provide Resources:

Offer information about available resources, such as sexual assault hotlines, counseling services, or support groups. Provide written materials or websites where they can find more information if they choose.

Educate Yourself:

Take the initiative to educate yourself about the effects of sexual assault, trauma-informed care, and available support services. This knowledge will enable you to offer more informed and compassionate support.

Respect Privacy:

Recognize the importance of privacy. Avoid discussing the survivor's experience with others without their explicit consent. Respect their boundaries and confidentiality.

Be Patient and Understanding:

Understand that healing from sexual assault is a process that takes time. Be patient and offer ongoing support without placing expectations on the survivor's timeline for recovery.

Encourage Professional Support:

Encourage the survivor to seek professional support from counselors, therapists, or support groups specializing in trauma and sexual assault. Offer to assist in finding suitable resources if needed.

Check-In Periodically:

Periodically check in with the survivor to see how they are feeling and if they need any additional support. Offer your presence without pressuring them to share more than they are comfortable with.

Respect Triggers:

Be mindful of potential triggers that may retraumatize the survivor. Respect their boundaries regarding certain topics or situations that may be triggering for them.

Model Healthy Coping Strategies:

Model healthy coping strategies and self-care. Show that seeking help and taking care of one's mental and emotional well-being is a sign of strength.

Remember, offering support after a sexual assault disclosure requires sensitivity, empathy, and respect for the survivor's autonomy. Each person's experience is unique, and tailoring your approach to their needs is crucial in fostering a supportive environment for healing.