Moving Beyond Your Ex: How Will I Ever Stop Thinking About My Ex?

 

Breakups can leave a lasting impact on our lives, and it's not uncommon to find yourself constantly thinking about your ex-partner, especially in lesbian relationships. However, dwelling on the past can hinder your healing process. In this article, we will explore strategies to help you navigate those persistent thoughts and move forward.

1. Accept Your Feelings:

It's essential to acknowledge that thinking about your ex is a natural part of the healing process. Be patient and compassionate with yourself. It's okay to grieve the loss of the relationship.

2. Limit Contact:

Cutting or limiting contact with your ex can help reduce the frequency of thoughts about them. Unfollow or mute them on social media, archive messages, and avoid situations where you might run into them.

3. Journal Your Thoughts:

Consider keeping a journal to express your feelings and thoughts about the breakup. Writing can be a therapeutic way to process your emotions and gain clarity.

4. Focus on Self-Care:

Redirect your energy toward self-care activities that promote your well-being. Engage in exercises, hobbies, and relaxation techniques that make you feel good about yourself.

5. Set New Goals:

Use this time to set new personal and professional goals. Accomplishing these objectives can help you shift your focus from the past to the future.

6. Seek Support:

Talk to friends, family, or a therapist about your feelings. Sharing your thoughts and emotions with others can provide a fresh perspective and emotional support.

7. Stay Present:

Mindfulness and meditation techniques can help you stay present and prevent your mind from wandering back to your past relationship.

8. Consider Closure:

If you feel that unresolved issues are keeping you tied to your ex, consider seeking closure through a conversation or letter. Sometimes, having closure can help alleviate lingering thoughts.

9. Explore New Interests:

Engaging in new activities and interests can help you form new associations and create memories outside of your previous relationship.

10. Give It Time:

Ultimately, time is the most effective healer. As the days and weeks go by, the frequency of thoughts about your ex will naturally decrease.

It's entirely normal to think about your ex after a breakup, especially in lesbian relationships where deep emotional connections are common. However, by accepting your feelings, setting boundaries, practicing self-care, and seeking support, you can gradually move beyond those thoughts and pave the way for a brighter and more fulfilling future. Remember, healing takes time, and you deserve to find happiness and peace once again.

What’s a Sex Swing (And How Do I Use One?): A Guide for Lesbian Couples

 

Sex swings can add an exciting and adventurous dimension to your intimate experiences as a lesbian couple. If you're curious about what a sex swing is and how to use one, this article is here to provide you with all the information you need to get started on this thrilling journey.

Understanding the Sex Swing:

A sex swing, also known as a love swing or pleasure swing, is a piece of sex furniture designed to support various sexual positions. It typically consists of straps, handles, and a seat or sling that allows partners to engage in weightless and gravity-defying sex acts.

Why Use a Sex Swing?

Enhanced Sensations: Sex swings allow for deeper penetration and unique angles, intensifying pleasure for both partners.

Exploration: Using a sex swing can lead to trying new positions and experiences that you might not have considered otherwise.

Accessibility: For couples with physical limitations or disabilities, sex swings can make sexual activity more accessible and enjoyable.

Choosing the Right Sex Swing:

When selecting a sex swing, consider factors such as weight capacity, material (nylon, leather, or fabric), and installation method (hanging from a door frame, ceiling, or stand-alone frame). Ensure that it meets your specific needs and preferences.

Installing Your Sex Swing:

Location: Decide where you want to install the sex swing. Common options include the bedroom, a playroom, or even the living room.

Support: Ensure that the chosen location can support the weight and movements of both partners. Install any necessary hooks or hardware securely.

Adjustment: Adjust the swing's height to your liking, making sure it's comfortable for both partners to enter and exit.

Using Your Sex Swing:

Safety First: Before using the sex swing, discuss boundaries, consent, and safe words with your partner. Safety and communication are paramount.

Entry and Exit: Carefully enter and exit the swing, ensuring stability and balance. You may need to help each other with this process.

Experiment: Use the swing to experiment with various positions and angles. Popular options include missionary, doggy style, and oral sex positions.

Communication: Continuously communicate with your partner during sex swing play. Ask for feedback and make adjustments as needed.

Cleaning and Maintenance:

Regularly clean your sex swing according to the manufacturer's instructions to ensure hygiene and longevity. Store it in a safe, dry place when not in use.

Exploring a sex swing can be an exciting and fulfilling adventure for lesbian couples. It offers a new dimension to your sexual experiences, fostering intimacy, trust, and pleasure. Remember that open communication, trust, and consent are essential for a satisfying and safe experience. So, embrace your curiosity and embark on this thrilling journey together!

Bouncing Back: Healing After a Gut-Wrenching Breakup

 

Breakups are undeniably tough, and the pain they bring can feel insurmountable. If you've recently gone through a gut-wrenching breakup in a lesbian relationship, remember that you're not alone. This article is a guide specifically tailored to women-loving women, offering insights, tips, and support on how to heal and move forward.

1. Allow Yourself to Grieve:

It's perfectly normal to feel a wide range of emotions after a breakup, including sadness, anger, and confusion. Allow yourself to feel these emotions without judgment. This is a crucial step in the healing process.

2. Lean on Your Support System:

Reach out to your friends, family, and LGBTQ+ community for support. Share your feelings and allow your loved ones to be there for you. Sometimes, talking about your pain can help alleviate it.

3. Self-Care is Essential:

During this challenging time, prioritize self-care. Take care of your physical and emotional well-being through activities like exercise, meditation, journaling, and maintaining a balanced diet.

4. Set Boundaries:

If possible, establish clear boundaries with your ex-partner to create emotional space for healing. This can include limiting or cutting off contact until you both have had time to process the breakup.

5. Reflect and Learn:

Use this time to reflect on the relationship and what you've learned from it. Consider what you want in future relationships and what aspects of yourself you'd like to improve.

6. Seek Professional Help if Needed:

If you find that the breakup is taking a severe toll on your mental health, don't hesitate to seek therapy or counseling. Talking to a mental health professional can provide valuable support and coping strategies.

7. Stay Connected to Your Identity:

Being part of the LGBTQ+ community is an essential aspect of your identity. Stay connected to this community through events, support groups, or online forums. Finding solace and camaraderie in your community can be incredibly healing.

8. Rediscover Your Passions:

Reconnect with your hobbies and interests that may have taken a backseat during your relationship. Engaging in activities you're passionate about can boost your self-esteem and bring joy back into your life.

9. Give It Time:

Healing from a gut-wrenching breakup is a process that takes time. Be patient with yourself and understand that there's no set timeline for moving on. Allow yourself to heal at your own pace.

10. Consider Future Relationships:

When you're ready, think about what you want in your next relationship. Take the lessons from your previous one and apply them to your future, ensuring a healthier and more fulfilling partnership.

Healing from a gut-wrenching breakup is challenging but entirely possible. Remember that your worth is not defined by your relationship status, and with time and self-care, you will recover. Lean on your support system, embrace self-discovery, and look forward to a brighter future filled with love, happiness, and personal growth.

Building Your Lesbian Sex Ed Library: 12 Essential Reads

 

A comprehensive understanding of sexual wellness is essential for every woman, including those in lesbian relationships. To create a fulfilling and satisfying intimate life, it's vital to have access to resources that empower and educate. In this article, we'll explore 12 must-have books for your female/lesbian sex education library.

1. "Lesbian Sex Bible" by Diana Cage:

This comprehensive guide covers everything from anatomy and communication to various techniques for passionate and fulfilling lesbian sex.

2. "The Whole Lesbian Sex Book" by Felice Newman:

A go-to resource for lesbians, this book offers practical advice and insights on various aspects of lesbian sexuality, relationships, and communication.

3. "Girl Sex 101" by Allison Moon and KD Diamond:

A fantastic read for beginners, this book covers a wide range of topics, including anatomy, communication, safer sex, and various sexual practices for women-loving women.

4. "Lesbian Couples: A Guide to Creating Healthy Relationships" by Merilee Clunis and G. Dorsey Green:

Focusing on relationship dynamics, this book explores communication, conflict resolution, and maintaining a healthy and fulfilling partnership.

5. "Come as You Are" by Emily Nagoski, Ph.D.:

Although not specifically for lesbians, this book delves into the science of women's sexuality, dispelling myths and providing insights into arousal, desire, and pleasure.

6. "The Ultimate Guide to Strap-On Sex" by Karlyn Lotney:

For couples interested in incorporating strap-on play into their sex life, this guide offers valuable tips, techniques, and insights.

7. "The Lesbian Kama Sutra" by Kat Harding:

This book combines the ancient wisdom of the Kama Sutra with contemporary lesbian experiences, providing inspiration and guidance for passionate lovemaking.

8. "Lesbian Love Addiction: Understanding the Urge to Merge and How to Heal When Things Go Wrong" by Lauren D. Costine, Ph.D.:

This insightful read explores the dynamics of love and relationships within the lesbian community, helping readers navigate challenges and create healthier connections.

9. "The Ethical Slut" by Janet W. Hardy and Dossie Easton:

While not exclusively for lesbians, this book delves into the world of ethical non-monogamy, offering valuable insights for those interested in exploring open relationships.

10. "Lesbian Health 101" by Merilee Clunis and Dorsey Green:

This comprehensive guide covers various aspects of lesbian health, including sexual health, mental well-being, and navigating the healthcare system as a lesbian.

11. "Queer: A Graphic History" by Meg-John Barker and Julia Scheele:

This engaging graphic novel explores LGBTQ+ history, theory, and concepts, providing a broader understanding of queer identities and relationships.

12. "Lesbian Intimacy: A Resource Guide for Seniors" by Jenny Deitz, Ph.D., and Kimberly W. Anderson-Matich, Ph.D.:

This important resource focuses on the sexual and emotional well-being of lesbian seniors, offering guidance on maintaining intimacy and relationships later in life.

Building a sex education library tailored to female/lesbian experiences is a powerful way to empower yourself with knowledge and strengthen your relationships. These 12 books cover a wide range of topics, from sexual techniques to relationship dynamics, and are invaluable resources for women-loving women looking to enhance their sexual wellness and intimate connections.

Navigating Anal Play: The Dos and Don'ts for Lesbian Couples

 

Anal play can be an exciting and intimate experience for lesbian couples looking to explore new sensations and heights of pleasure. However, it's essential to approach it with care, communication, and awareness of the dos and don'ts to ensure a safe and enjoyable experience. In this article, we'll explore the key guidelines for lesbian couples interested in anal play.

The Dos:

1. Communication is Essential:

Open and honest communication is the foundation of any successful sexual exploration, especially when it comes to anal play. Discuss desires, boundaries, and any concerns with your partner beforehand to ensure you're both on the same page.

2. Lubrication is a Must:

The rectum doesn't naturally lubricate like the vagina, so using a high-quality lubricant is crucial. Opt for a water-based or silicone-based lube, as they provide long-lasting glide. Reapply as needed during your play.

3. Start Slowly:

Anal play is a gradual process, especially if you're new to it. Begin with gentle finger exploration or small anal toys designed for beginners. As you become more comfortable, you can progress to larger toys or other activities.

4. Use Protection:

If you're using toys or engaging in anal-oral play (rimming), consider using dental dams or other barriers to reduce the risk of exposure to bacteria or infections.

5. Relaxation and Breathing:

The receptive partner should be relaxed and comfortable during anal play. Deep, slow breathing can help relax the pelvic muscles, making penetration more comfortable. Take your time, and don't rush the process.

The Don'ts:

1. Rushing Into It:

Anal play should never be rushed or forced. Pushing too quickly can cause discomfort or pain. Ensure both partners are ready and enthusiastic about exploring this type of play.

2. Skipping Lubrication:

Insufficient lubrication is a recipe for discomfort and potential injury. Never attempt anal play without using an ample amount of lubricant. Reapply as needed throughout your session.

3. Ignoring Hygiene:

Proper hygiene is essential for anal play. Ensure both partners clean the anal area thoroughly before engaging in any activity. A warm, soapy wash or an enema can help ensure cleanliness.

4. Disregarding Boundaries:

Respect your partner's boundaries and comfort levels at all times. If your partner expresses discomfort or asks to stop, do so immediately. Consent and mutual enjoyment should always be a priority.

5. Anal-to-Vaginal Contact:

Avoid direct contact between the anus and the vagina during play. This can introduce harmful bacteria into the vagina and increase the risk of infection. If you wish to switch from anal to vaginal play, wash or change condoms/dental dams first.

Exploring anal play in a lesbian relationship can be a pleasurable and intimate experience when approached with care and respect for each other's boundaries. By following the dos and don'ts outlined in this article, you can ensure a safe and enjoyable journey into anal exploration. Always prioritize open communication, consent, and the use of adequate lubrication to make the experience as comfortable and satisfying as possible.

Elevating Your 69: 6 Ways to Enhance Mutual Pleasure for Lesbian Couples

 

The 69 position, known for its simultaneous oral pleasure, can be an exhilarating and intimate experience for lesbian couples. It offers a unique opportunity for mutual satisfaction and can deepen the connection between partners. In this article, we'll explore six ways to elevate your 69 experience, tailored specifically for women in same-sex relationships.

1. Communication is Key:

Effective communication is crucial for any sexual activity, including the 69 position. Discuss your desires, boundaries, and preferences with your partner beforehand. Open dialogue ensures that both partners feel comfortable and respected throughout the experience.

2. Mutual Hygiene:

Before engaging in a 69, both partners should feel fresh and clean. Taking a shower or bath together can be a sensual way to prepare. You might also consider flavored lubricants or dental dams to enhance comfort and hygiene.

3. Positioning and Comfort:

Experiment with different positions to find what works best for both of you. Some couples prefer a traditional 69, with one partner on top of the other. Others might find a side-by-side or stacked position more comfortable. Use pillows or cushions for support, and ensure you can maintain the position without strain.

4. Focus on Technique:

Enhance your oral technique by paying attention to your partner's cues and feedback. Use a combination of techniques, including licking, sucking, and gentle nibbling. Explore different areas, such as the clitoris, labia, and perineum, to discover what elicits the most pleasure.

5. Incorporate Toys:

Introducing sex toys can add an exciting dimension to your 69 experience. Vibrators or suction toys designed for clitoral stimulation can intensify sensations for both partners. Ensure the toys are clean and compatible with each other's bodies.

6. Slow and Sensual Approach:

Take your time during a 69 encounter. The slower, more deliberate approach can build anticipation and heighten pleasure. Focus on the journey rather than rushing toward orgasm. This can lead to a more profound and satisfying experience.

The 69 position offers a unique opportunity for lesbian couples to explore mutual pleasure and intimacy. By prioritizing communication, hygiene, comfort, technique, and sensuality, you can elevate your 69 encounters to new heights of satisfaction. Remember that every couple is different, so don't be afraid to experiment and tailor your experience to suit your desires and preferences.

Exploring Kink and BDSM Ideas for Lesbian Couples

 

Kink and BDSM (Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, and Masochism) practices can be a thrilling and fulfilling aspect of sexual intimacy for lesbian couples. These activities involve exploring power dynamics, role-play, and various forms of sensory and psychological stimulation. In this article, we'll discuss kink and BDSM ideas specifically tailored for women in same-sex relationships, emphasizing trust, communication, and consent.

Understanding Kink and BDSM:

Kink and BDSM encompass a wide range of activities and interests. These might include bondage, spanking, sensation play, role-play, and more. It's essential to remember that all BDSM activities should be consensual, safe, and conducted with open communication between partners.

Exploring Kink and BDSM as Lesbian Couples:

Communication is Key: Start by having an open and honest conversation about your desires, boundaries, and limits. Establish a safe word or signal to ensure both partners feel comfortable and in control during play.

Trust and Consent: Trust is the foundation of BDSM play. Ensure that both you and your partner have complete trust in one another. All activities should be consensual, meaning that both parties willingly agree to participate.

Education: Educate yourselves about BDSM practices and safety. There are numerous resources available online and in books to help you understand the dynamics, techniques, and safety measures associated with BDSM.

Kink and BDSM Ideas for Lesbian Couples:

Role-Playing: Experiment with role-play scenarios that appeal to both partners. This might include teacher-student, doctor-patient, or fantasy-based roles.

Sensation Play: Explore sensation play using various tools like feathers, ice, or silk. Blindfolding your partner can enhance the experience by heightening their sense of touch.

Bondage: Use soft restraints like silk ties or scarves to explore bondage. Practice tying knots safely to ensure easy release.

Impact Play: Light spanking or flogging can be arousing for many couples. Start gently and gradually increase intensity based on your partner's preferences.

Domination and Submission: Experiment with power dynamics by taking on dominant and submissive roles. Ensure you both have a clear understanding of your roles and responsibilities.

Verbal Play: Engage in verbal humiliation or praise, depending on your preferences. Always communicate boundaries and check in with your partner during verbal play.

Toys and Equipment: Invest in quality BDSM toys and equipment, such as paddles, floggers, and restraints. Make sure to clean and maintain them properly.

Temperature Play: Explore temperature play by using heated or chilled objects, like warmed massage oil or ice cubes, to stimulate different sensations.

Wax Play: Drip low-temperature wax onto your partner's body for a unique sensation. Ensure you use specially designed candles for safety.

Aftercare: After BDSM play, engage in aftercare, which involves comforting and reassuring each other. Cuddling, gentle massages, or simply talking can help ease the transition back to everyday life.

Kink and BDSM can be exciting and fulfilling for lesbian couples seeking to explore their desires and deepen their intimacy. Remember that consent, communication, and trust are paramount in all BDSM activities. Always prioritize safety, and continually check in with your partner to ensure their comfort and well-being. By approaching these practices with respect and openness, you can create a mutually satisfying and enriching experience within your relationship.